Thursday, July 8, 2010

The Hockey Equivalent of the NBA Free Agent Signings

The 2010 Hockey Free Agency was like a little Caesar's five dollar pizza. Terrible, but satisfying because it's pizza and it's a meal for five bucks.

The 2010 NBA free agency is like a pizza made by Gordon Ramsay and then jizzed all over it.

As everyone knows, Lebron James, Dwanye Wade and Chris Bosh have all signed together on the same team.

Here are the hockey equivalents if this happened:

*Note that the NBA is what happened in the offseason. NHL could have happened in past/will never happen

NBA: LBJ (super mega gigastar), D-Wade (superstar but injury prone), CB4 (good all-star)- Miami
NHL: Sidney Cumsby, Marion Gaborik (superstar but groin problems from sex with Demitra), Rick Nash (great players, but has been on crappy teams) - Tampa Bay

NBA: Amare Stoudemire (all about himself and the money) - New York Knicks
NHL: Alexei Yashin (fag) - New York Islanders

NBA: Dirk Nowitzki (Best german player ever) - resigns Dallas
NHL: Teemu Selanne (One of the best fins ever) - Ducks

NBA: Paul Pierce (aging superstar) - resigns with Boston
NHL: Jarome Iginla (aging superstar) - resigns with Calgary at the Twilight of his career


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