1. The jannik hansen: Offer him less than the league minimum.
2. The darryl sutter: Bribe the arbitrating judge with seasons tickets... In the sport chek zone.
3. The stan bowman: In front of the judge, compare your rfa to players much inferior than your rfa. For example stan bowman (who I know reads this blog), you should compare auntie niemi to ray emery or michael leighton. Both goalies that have taken their team to the stanley cup finals but are making under 2 million. If the judge agrees, niemi will be pissed you undersold him and he won't want to play for your team.
4. The SOB: Tell your rfa that there is a good place on the farm team for him next season.
5.The dany heatley: Give your rfa the weong date for the court hearing. When he doesn't show up you tell the judge he's dealing with a drinking and driving offense in the next court room over.
6. The mike fisher: Hire kate hudson to pretend to be in love with your rfa.
7. The marion gay-borik: Tell your rfa that he has aids from scissoring with pavol demitra.
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